Wednesday, May 6, 2009

Are you killing your relationship? - ARTICLE

Are you killing your relationship?

A relationship needs to breathe. External friendships, time apart, activities where you are not together with your partner are all super healthy for your couple.
You tend sometimes to block these from happening because you fear being alone or standing as an individual.

Being part of a couple does not mean you loose your individuality. If you can only function as a couple, this tends to create a very high level of insecurity. On the long term, it makes you totally dependent on your partner's presence.

The goal is to maintain or recover your power as an individual. Everyone benefits from it. It gives greater stability to you and all those who are involved in your life.

When you spend time apart, you don't betray the relationship. You give it some space and fresh air. You bring in a new stream of inspiration you might use to empower what you share.

There is a quality every couple needs. It is called renewal power. Renewal power is the ability to keep evolving. When you are single, it's easier. When you are a couple you tend to freeze your partner's moves and block the integration of fresh energies. It is a natural instinctual reaction which works against the long term success of your partnership.

Renewal power is a conscious force you bring in. It means you take risks and challenge each other. You simply don't accept your present limits as your final limits, keep evolving and moving forward.

Renewal power is a natural force of evolution. When you resist change endlessly you block these forces of evolution. You keep them out for a while until they break open in a stream of powerful destruction.

Why do they destroy? because you get too much renewal at once.

If you use renewal power on a daily base, you simply digest it regularly and use it in a positive way.

Imagine the energy of a volcano building up. If you create channels for this stream of power, and let the boiling lava come out, the energy simply flows in a constructive way.

If you try to block it, it will explode.

A relationship needs renewal and fresh inspiration. It needs challenge and some risk.
Don't reject the renewal power, use it!

How? by responding to the opportunities which are in front of you.

  • Give your partner some space when they need it.
  • Give yourself a break
  • Go with the flow
  • Be opened for new friendships
  • Take risks
  • Challenge yourself
  • Respond to opportunities
  • etc.

When you keep stepping back and hiding within your comfort zone, you simply block a natural stream of life force. You can't cheat with evolution. It keeps on pushing until it breaks through. You spirit, your life needs to keep evolving.

If you bloc, these forces, you'll slowly asphyxiate your life and your relationship
So, don't be afraid and go for it. Renewal forces are part of your life and spirit. They are here to sustain your evolution.